Self compassion

Reverb11
Prompt for December 18: Self compassion: Were you gentle with yourself in 2011? Tell us about how you were compassionate towards yourself in 2011. Or maybe you want to be more compassionate in 2012. How will you be kind to yourself?


In January, I declared that 2011 would be the year of love and self-indulgence.


Outwardly, I failed miserably. I didn't splurge wildly or over-indulge myself in anyway. I didn't throw caution to the wind or take chances. I spent much of the year stressed about work- under rested and over caffeinated. I ended several friendships and set serious boundaries in others.


I think that last part- the friendship ending- was the most compassionate thing I've done for myself in a very long time. I've come to realize that self- indulgence and self-compassion don't have to be about giving yourself a free pass or being wildly frivolous. It can just be about saying no. It can mean taking time for myself; refusing to feel guilty; raising my standards; choosing not to give it my all.


So maybe I failed on a large scale, but I won so many smaller battles. In 2012 I can only hope for more of the same. I hope to continue to set boundaries and reasonable expectations for myself. I hope to take time out for my sanity, and to learn to place blame where it is warranted. 
I suppose a little bit of coddling and frivolity are in order too.